How important is the afterplay of sex?

July 05, 2023 Inyarose

What exactly should I do after sex? For men, it may be the end of the line after orgasm, but for women, it's not!

After a perfect sexual encounter, a woman's body produces a large amount of oxytocin, also known as the "love hormone". It provides a sense of satisfaction and security, amplifies human emotional activity, and promotes and strengthens attachment to both sexes. With oxytocin, women tend to be more attached to their partners, so the post-sex period is the best time to bond.

But whether in the East or West, men seem to be very lacking in the concept of "afterplay". When flirting by any means, but afterwards can not do anything? Surveys show that most men do these things that are offensive to women at the time of what should be afterplay:

32% of men immediately lay down to adjust their breathing or smoke;

17% of the men went to sleep quickly;

14% of men got up immediately to go to the bathroom

9% of men immediately went to the shower;

65% of men also had an extra meal after doing the above

Another 2% of men ready to do it again ......

"Every time after sex, he falls back to sleep, he is satisfied, but I always have some unfulfilled feeling." Most women make more or less similar complaints after sex.

The book "fundamentals of human sexuality" also mentions some minor differences in behavior between men and women after sex: "Regardless of the purpose of sex or how to reach orgasm, boys tend to rest immediately and withdraw from the act of sex, while girls usually want to cling to each other and prolong sex. "

In response to these statements, I also asked some of my male friends, and their answers were summarized similarly to the above description: "It's true, it's as if the whole process of movement stops immediately with that ejaculation, the world is instantly quiet, and at that time, the whole state of being is just wanting to be alone."

But speaking as a girl, I do have a completely different feeling or experience from the above-mentioned guy's statement, especially after reaching a strong orgasm.

Specifically, after a girl reaches a true orgasm, her waning period lasts for quite a while, perhaps about 10 to 15 minutes or even up to half an hour, and perhaps the same long waning period exists for guys.

But a key point to note is that, as I understand it, the range of response during a boy's orgasm is relatively limited, almost point-like around the penis, while the range of response during a girl's orgasm is almost radial and will diffuse from one point to the whole body. I suspect that this is the key thing that causes the different needs of men and women for afterplay after orgasm.

The girl's body will be awakened and aroused by the feeling of pleasure that pervades the whole body. This time, the light touch will make the girl's body like an electric current through the same, the current from a point, again expanded, the feeling is really comfortable, is a kind of pleasure experience compared with the former medium-term, will not appear.

The above is the physiological level of feeling, and from the psychological level, after sex or orgasm, the presence of afterplay can make girls feel a sense of being loved fullness, satisfaction and security, there will be a little wrapped up back in the womb.

Having said that, some people will be eager to ask: "What about the afterplay? Are there any tips?"

In fact, the aftershow does not need any too complicated skills, two people quietly embracing together, caressing or kissing each other, it is already a great feeling, or, when sanity returns, and then say some intimate words to each other. I think, although the boy's body has nothing additional pleasurable experience, but he certainly will not reject such a tender time it.

And so completely arrived at the end of the time, the two sides can also carry out some simple communication, which can also be reluctantly counted as part of the after-play, effective communication afterwards can fully enhance the intimacy between the two people, and for the sexual activity is to have a positive role in promoting.

You can take the initiative and say, "I liked that action and intensity earlier." Or, "That behavior made me uncomfortable, so don't show it again."

In the sport of sex, no two people in this world can hit it off instantly; both need to keep learning, exploring, bonding and progressing together. You need to be clear that you are perfectly capable of clearly expressing your likes and dislikes to your partner, and that doing so is emotionally beneficial to both parties.